Public Service or Sick Entertainment?

Recently, I was tipped off to an in-depth article in Esquire magazine that went behind the scenes of Dateline NBC's "To Catch a Predator." If you're not familiar with the prime time series you can get the lowdown here, but basically Dateline (hosted by Chris Hansen) teams up with an independent "watchdog" group to catch sexual predators in online chats with minors.

Then Dateline hires an actor to pose as the minor, talk with the offenders on the phone and set up an in-person meeting at a house leased by Dateline. The decoy house, as it is known, is wired with all kinds of microphones and cameras so not a single moment is missed when Hansen confronts the people who come to the house thinking they're going to have an encounter with a minor. After the interview, the predator is arrested upon leaving the decoy house by local law enforcement who have been previously informed by Dateline about who to look for, when and where.

While Dateline sells the show by saying they're helping to take dangerous people off the streets, I think the whole premise is gory. It provides the audience with the chance to watch someone be set up and humiliated, plain and simple. Although I have no sympathy for these criminals, I don't think it's the role of the news media to conduct sting operations involving sexual predators and then televise them as investigative reporting and a public service. I mean, if it was really about catching dangerous people then why aren't they arrested after engaging in the online sexual solicitation of minors? After all, that is the actual crime. Why the need for a decoy house? Because it makes for dramatic, some would say "good," television.

Well, that drama was turned up a notch when a man from Texas, a felony prosecutor no less, was involved in the online chat sting. Bill Conradt used very explicit language in chatting with who he believed was a 13-year-old boy and after several phone conversations Conradt agreed to a meeting. However, he never showed up. Dateline's actor called the man several times trying to entice him into coming to the decoy house, Conradt continued to say he would be there, but he never followed through.

Conradt had already committed a crime, so police, and Dateline, decided to confront the man at his home. This is where the waters get very murky. While it was necessary for the police to go to the Conradt's residence for the arrest, why was it necessary for Dateline to be there? Conradt did not take Dateline's bait to show up at the decoy house, so shouldn't their involvement have ended there?

Well, Dateline was at the house and so was the SWAT team. Once Conradt realized he was caught he decided to take his own life while still inside his home. Suddenly, the light began to shine very brightly on Dateline's "To Catch a Predator."

20/20 did a story involving the show and, like the Esquire magazine article, painted a very dark picture of the incident where Dateline didn't just tag along with police or conduct it's own independent investigation - 20/20 pointed out that there are allegations (from people who worked on that particular episode) that the show actually may have influenced police procedure. A former police officer who provided security for the Dateline crew even goes so far as to say that the arrests that are caught on tape are set up to give the most dramatic visual effect and not to insure the safety of the police officers themselves.

This all just doesn't sit well with me. Not only do I not see this show as a form of public service, but I find it dangerous that a camera crew can influence who gets arrested, when and where. (By the way, Dateline aired the Conradt story - SWAT team, ambulance, medical helicopter and all - weeks ago. Apparently they didn't feel any responsibility when it came to how things turned out. I mean, the guy was a criminal, he doesn't deserve to be treated like a human, does he? They certainly didn't air the episode to expose Conradt publicly as a threat to our children - he was already dead by then.)

There are so many facets to this story, and I've written so much already, that I can't possibly get into them all. However, I encourage you to read the Esquire article and really think about how far is too far? Are we really doing a service to ourselves or our children by watching these kinds of shows or are we being sadistic voyeurs who are feeding into the lowest of the low in television news and entertainment?

I don't want sexual predators anywhere near my children either, but I really don't think "To Catch a Predator" is the answer. After all, about 90% of sex crimes against children are perpetrated by someone the children know, so it's really more important to know about the people who your children come into contact with everyday rather than the random guy down the street or on the Internet. And if Dateline isn't providing us with any answers, then why are they on TV again?

Homework

Just when I thought the "new stuff" was slowing down . . . Tonight my five-year-old son did this:

That's right - Homework. We have five worksheets to do this week and they're due on Friday. That's one each night and two on one night. (I wanted to start him off right, so we did two tonight.)

But aside from the technical/practical aspects (homework for him, of course, means homework for me), there is the emotional side. I mean, I was just getting used to him being a big kindergartener, a soccer superstar, someone who doesn't need me to open things for him at lunchtime - and now he's doing homework!!! Before I know it he's going to be graduating from college!!

How much more should one mother have to take?

I'm a Soccer Mom

Well, it's official. I'm a true soccer mom (sans mini-van).

The soccer season started last week and my older son had his first game on Saturday. He looked so grown up in his uniform and cleats. I mean, I thought he looked so much older when I saw him off to his first day of school last week, but the shiny green jersey with the white #11 on the back - well, all his little boyness disappeared (possibly) forever.

He did great. It was organized chaos really, but he had lots of fun. It was great watching him interact with other kids and adults he didn't really know without my help. Time is flying by and even though I say I'm going to try and experience every moment, I find myself constantly amazed at how quickly things are changing and always feeling like I've missed so much.

But back to me . . . My son had practice tonight and I loaded up the car with water bottles, soccer ball, etc. and we headed to the field. He ran right out to his team when we got there and my younger son and I proceeded to kick the ball around off to the side. My little one got tired and so I went and got the two fold up chairs that I now keep permanently in the back of my car and it occurred to me - I have chairs in the back of my car; chairs to watch my son's soccer games and practices; I'm at soccer practice - I'm a soccer mom.

I looked around at all the kids running around, at all the parents on their blankets or sitting in their own woven, fold up chairs and I realized that I've become a "real" parent. Not that getting up in the middle of the night for feedings didn't count. Not that managing two kids in a toy store wasn't a wake up call. Not that doing homework didn't make me feel parentish. But tonight was one of those moments when it hit me like a ton of bricks. I am a parent - like my own parents who I still see through the eyes of a child - and it's crazy to think that I am that responsible, that old, that grown up.

So I came home and decided to have cookie dough ice cream for dinner. Where does that fall in the world of responsible parenting?

First Day of School

Off he goes

To begin his journey

Separate from my own

He doesn't look back

Too focused

On the many possibilities before him

He will lead

I will follow behind

In awe

As he grows

Into the man he is meant to be

The Waiting Place

"...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a sting of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting."

**The Places You'll Go, Dr. Seuss


I feel like I'm in the Waiting Place right about now - waiting for things to happen so that I can react to them. Waiting for a new career opportunity. Waiting to figure out what it is exactly that I want to be doing right now. Waiting to decide whether or not to go back to school. Waiting for the kids to get older. Waiting until we have more money. Waiting to find the courage to take the risk(s).

Never been a mover or a shaker, but it feels like I haven't been doing much of anything lately except maybe treading water. Going nowhere. Not that I haven't got ideas about what I think I want; I've just been too scared to take action for fear of failure. So I choose to remain stagnant - to wait for what sign or words I don't know - which is an action of sorts, I suppose, but a passive one at best.

Yet, I'm not sad or angry about my indecision. I see the opportunity in it all. I see that there are challenges ahead and all I need do is stand up and take them head on. I see the need to call my own shots because no one else is looking out for me, but me. No one else can make this happen. If I want to leave the Waiting Place I have to open the door myself and walk through to the other side - alone.

I'm not sure what's on the other side of that door. It's certainly been easier up to now to wait for those opportunities to just show up, but I think I've had enough of all the waiting. Kind of boring. Kind of frustrating in that I have very little control when I just wait.

Do you ever get stuck in the waiting place?
Once I make it out, I promise to leave the door cracked for you :)

I Need an Intervention

I have a problem. And they say that admitting you have a problem is the first step in recovery. But somehow I don't think a few words is going to help. This is serious. I need real help. It's this compulsion I have and even though I know I shouldn't . . . I do.

What do I do? Are you sure you want to know? It's not your run of the mill addiction. It's not alcohol or drugs or television or gambling or porn . . .

I have this thing for (gulp) college ruled notebooks.

I know. I know. It's a sickness really and I always have the hardest time during all of these back-to-school sales. I mean. They're everywhere! I go to Target and there are aisles of them! I go to CVS and they're practically calling to me from the center aisle! The bookstore! The office supply store - OK. I should know better than to go into an office supply store . . .

Yesterday it was these elusive college ruled composition books that I've been looking for. See, those black and white speckled composition books are great, but they're ALL wide ruled. I don't like wide ruled paper. I just don't. But I like composition books and I haven't been able to find any with college ruled paper. Until today.

I went into CVS after my dentist appointment and (this is hard to admit as well) I bought some M & M's. Yes, I bought candy after my dentist appointment at which I had two cavities filled. I have faults, people. Anyway, I could hear something calling to me from across the store and I couldn't help but heed its call. It didn't take very long until I found them - the elusive college ruled composition books! Thank you, Five Star!!

And since I had some CVS Extra Bucks to spend, I bought three! Not one, not two, THREE!! (This after buying a small, black journal/notebook at the bookstore just 10 minutes before.) So now I have more notebooks than I know what to do with and a son who is only in kindergarten and can only write his name anyway and I know that I have contributed to the deaths of so many trees because of my compulsion . . .

But I DON'T KNOW HOW TO STOP!!! (I have a thing for pens as well, but find I only need a fix every six weeks or so.)

So if you have any ideas on how to help me or maybe Cheryl can make a call into that cable intervention show . . . At any rate, thank you for listening. I hope none of you are disappointed in me because of my weakness. I'm not a religious person, but if you are - pray for me.


P.S. My five year old's word of the day yesterday? Apprehensive. "It's when you're kind of nervous about something. You know. It's the same as being anxious." -- I say he goes straight to first grade within the first two weeks of school.

More Arbitrary Chatter

So the other day my five-year-old asked me if I wanted to hear a story. Sure, I said. OK. The title of this story is "Calamity at the Castle." What? What did you say?

FYO: Do you know what calamity means?
Me: Well, yes, I do. But do you?
FYO: Yes. Calamity means when something very bad happens.
Me: Wow. That's a great word, buddy.
FYO: I know. So do you want to hear the story now?

Apparently my son has been picking up all kinds of new words while playing on the online Noggin website. Recently he has been using some pretty big words and is able to recite the definitions to the following (now remember we're talking a five-year-old): exhilarating, calamity, commotion, ferocious, labyrinth and enthusiastic.

Seriously, when he used the word exhilarating the other day he made my sister feel bad because she now thinks he has a better vocabulary than she does. I guess it just goes to show you (again) that kids' brains ARE like sponges (I wish mine was these days!) so be careful what you say!!

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OK it's been disgustingly hot since yesterday - Mid-90's and VERY humid. So we went and got ice cream yesterday. My kids went with the good, old reliables chocolate and vanilla. My husband got a chocolate soft serve and I got a flavor known as cake batter. Yes, cake batter and let me tell you that it was phenomenal!!

It really tasted just like licking the cake beaters when you bake a cake. It was so good! It was a yellow cake base with some chocolate cake batter chunks mixed in. I just had to share that. If you're looking for something a little new, and really, really good - go for the cake batter ice cream.

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I am reading a CRAZY book right now. (A lot of capital letters today. Don't know why.) It's called "It Can't Happen Here," and it was written by Sinclair Lewis. Published back in 1935 it's the story of fascism oozing it's way into U.S. democracy. Now it doesn't creep in like some quiet cat that sneaks up on you. Oh, no. In this tale fascism comes right down Main Street with bands playing and politicians endorsing its tenets without, of course, calling it fascism.

The greatest part of this book though is that although it was written more than 70 years ago, the world Lewis describes VERY MUCH resembles the United States of 2007. That's right. He might as well be writing about the Bush Administration and the liberties that they are taking like extending the rights of executive privilege (to the status of king) and promising people they'll have more money in their pockets if citizens vote for a particular candidate. (Remember those tax cuts a few years back?)

Like I said I'm only about 100 pages in, but the similarities are already freaking me out. I promise a full review when I'm finished. (A shout out to my husband for peaking my interest and suggesting the book. We're both reading it right now and I'm hoping to have some great discussions.)

All right. It's getting late. Have a great Monday everybody!

Sunday Night Random

Another installment of "Kids Say the Funniest Things"

(While Wrestling)
Five-Year-Old: Daddy, do you know why you remind me of a termite?

Daddy: Why?

FYO: (Punching Daddy's stomach) Because your body's so soft!

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I've also done my monthly post over at The Soccer Mom Vote. This time I took on the timely topic of teens and curfews at, of all places, the mall. Yes, there are malls across the country making it their policy to force teens out by a certain hour (some as early as 2 p.m.) unless accompanied by an adult. (I don't know about you, but my friends and I used to go to the mall to get away from our parents.) Nothing heavy, but something to think about.

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One more thing. I'm in love with John Edwards. Not just because he's dashing and got great hair. No I love his policy ideas the most. And his wife. She's my kind of First Lady. Although I'm finding it almost comical to watch the political gaming going on so early in this run for the 2008 Presidency, I enjoy John Edwards. He's my candidate in '08.

Shadowtails, Ferishers & Graylings - Oh My!

I finished a wonderful book today. Really. I may become a fantasy genre reader yet.

It's called, "Summerland," and it's written by Michael Chabon. (He won a Pulitzer for The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, which I have not read, but I did read Wonder Boys quite a few years back and enjoyed that.) Once again, I found myself in the realm of "Children's Literature," and again found myself so presently surprised to have enjoyed it as much as I did.

I mean, Harry Potter certainly has gotten me on a a series of new paths in reading. First of all, I never thought I would enjoy children's literature so much as an adult. I love the imagination of it all. The characters who are so often untouched by the grizzled old hands of "real life" and their ability to have hope against all odds because they haven't been disappointed as many times as we adults.

And then there's the science fiction/fantasy genre itself. I mean, I NEVER as a child read this kind of stuff. I never read The Chronicles of Narnia and I found myself bored to sleep, literally, by "The Hobbit," and there were a few books my dad had suggested to me (he's a big Sci-Fi guy) which I read, but have long forgotten having made no real impression on me. But this - this is GOOD stuff.

I love Chabon's use of language when he uses words we know, but gives them a twist - scampering to mean moving between worlds or quite possible my favorite two words in the book: careful abandon. I also love the names of the characters and the words he simply makes up - ferishers, graylings, skrikers, Cinquefoil, Cutbelly, Skidbladnire, Applelawn, Spider-Rose . . . I could go on for days.

Then there is the story itself. One filled with all kinds of Native American folklore, a central baseball theme (that you don't have to be a player to enjoy, but if you are or ever were it will tug at your heartstrings and you will truly be able to smell that fresh cut outfield grass once again), a story about loss, about growing up but not so much that one forgets to be a child, it's about hope and imagination, good versus evil and most of all it's about Believing.

I highly recommend this book. I got off to a slow start with it, but once I read a few chapters in I found it hard to put down night after night. It's not so much a page turner as it is an adventure that involves characters I really grew to care about. I wanted to see where each new day was taking them. I would suggest it to anyone in the "tween" to early teen set as well.

So now I get to do my second favorite thing after reading a book. I'm going to pass it on to someone else. It was passed to me after two of my friends read it and enjoyed it and now I will be passing it onto another who I'm quite sure will enjoy it as well. (He reads my blog from time to time so I didn't want to give too much away :)

Sharing a book is one of the great things we get to do in this life. It's one of those things that separates us from other animals. And while I like writing little reviews in order to spark the interest of others, there's nothing like receiving/giving a physical copy of a book as it travels among friends.

Good night, all, and happy reading.

Another Day, Another Recall

I was driving into work this morning and was informed by the radio news anchor that Mattel has issued a toy recall involving some 9 million pieces. This, of course, comes after Fisher-Price recalled 1.5 million toys and RC2 Corporation recalled another 1.5 million Thomas the Tank Engine characters because paint that was used in production was contaminated with lead.

This (as we all know) has shed an unflattering light upon the manufacturing practices in China. It hasn't just been toys that have caused alarm, but food and children's jewelery and toothpaste . . . We've all heard about it so there is no point in recapping everything. Let's just say that there is a BIG problem.

However, my reprimand isn't necessarily aimed at the government inspectors (or lack there of) because I think it's unreasonable to expect that EVERY product that comes into this country be inspected upon arrival before it reaches store shelves - at least not by some government agency. No, I feel that the onus here is on the corporations selling us the products.

You see, when I exchange my hard earned money for a product that I need or want, I in turn feel that the manufacturers of said product should be selling me a safe product. Why else would I buy it? (Especially for my children.) It's an unwritten contract of sorts - I pay you, you provide me with something that won't make me or my family ill. Sounds pretty simple, doesn't it?

Now things in China are exploding. They are experiencing an Industrial Revolution right now much like the one the U.S. experienced nearly 200 years ago. I think most of us reading this right now remember the horror stories from our history classes of child labor, industrial accidents that resulted in the loss of limbs, etc. Anyone read Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle?" I mean, the Industrial Revolution was about survival not quality control.

Which brings me to my point that since we all know what is happening in China, where are the representatives from these big corporations who choose to move overseas and manufacture their products there? Where are the company inspectors and production managers to oversee the actual making of these goods that they are selling to us? If you moved your business to a foreign country with different standards and regulations wouldn't you, as a business owner, want to know exactly what was happening on the production line? Wouldn't you want to make sure that the products being produced there were as good, if not better since you're saving money in production, as all the others carrying your company name and reputation?

I know I would. But then again big business isn't concerned with the actual product they put out, but are more focused on profit margins and seeing how little money they can spend on production to bring in more money for profit.

I think it's time for some good old-fashioned self regulation, so instead of boycotting China (which, no doubt, needs some help) why don't we start boycotting the companies themselves until they can prove to us that they're making their products safe? That in turn would help China improve its own quality and safety issues because the companies they're working for would insist upon a better, safer product.

Kids Truly Are Great

While sitting eating my lunch today, I had the following conversation with my three-year-old son:

O: Mommy, can I have some of your chips?

ME: No. You already had some chips with your lunch. These are mine.

O: But I'm really hungry. Won't you share with me?

ME: No. You've had enough.

O: You should share. Trust me. It's what friends do.


Of course I gave him a couple . . . After I stopped laughing!

If Harry Can't Do It, Who Can?

I know I say it all the time, but seriously, I LOVE National Public Radio. I listen to it everyday on my way to and from work and I'm always amazed at how many interesting stories there are out there. And they're not just 1 minute stories with cutesy soundbytes - the reporters tell a full story (and I love the way they use sound in the background for say a busy street market while they're speaking).

Anyway, I caught this topic today, Summer Reading and Harry Potter. In case you've been living in a cave for the past three weeks, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the final installment of the Harry Potter series, will be released on July 21st and has brought about the usual discussions of children and their reading habits.

I'd always heard praise for the series because it was credited with getting millions of kids reading. And while not wanting to take away from what author J.K. Rowling has accomplished, it appears that while kids may be reading Harry Potter they aren't reading much else. As David Mehegan talked about today on NPR, and in a July 9th article in the Boston Globe, a recent survey conducted by the National Endowment for the Arts titled "Reading at Risk" found that leisurely reading among teens and adults has actually declined.

The New York Times wrote about the same topic in today's edition. Reporter Motoko Rich writes that the percentage of kids who say they read for fun drops from 43% of fourth graders to only 19% of eighth graders. And why is that?

Some believe it's television, although studies don't seem to show any kind of increase in television viewing between the age groups. The consensus seems to be that there are just SO MANY things competing for children's time - television, video games, music, the Internet, text messaging, cell phones and don't forget those traditional activities of going to the movies with friends, athletics and just plain old hangin' around.

I would say that I experienced a similar decline in my own reading life. I was an avid reader for much of my young life and then right around my freshman or sophomore year in high school - I just sort of stopped. Reading became a homework assignment; something I had to do; books assigned to me by teachers I felt didn't understand me and had no idea what I'd like to read.

It wasn't until I was in my early twenties that I returned to the wonderful world of reading for pleasure. I started with fiction - my first love - but have branched out in recent years with plenty of non-fiction which includes some of my favorite magazines. While I don't pretend to represent all kids, I think my experience is pretty common. It was, at least, among my own friends at the time.

So maybe kids aren't all that different today than they were 10 or 20 years ago. Maybe we're just taking more notice because of our fear of "losing" them to a world of technology that we as adults don't fully understand.

What I hope is that those kids who don't read just for the sheer pleasure of it right now will find themselves devouring all that they missed out on in 10 years or so because making my way back to books - smelling those new, never touched, crisp, clean pages of a good novel - has been one of the best experiences (and continues to be) of my life.

In Kiernan's Eyes

Sometimes I think the world must seem a very cruel place, through my baby's eyes.

As a newborn, his world was full of discomfort - colic, milk and soy protein intolerances we hadn't quite figured out, and reflux. If someone wasn't holding him, he just couldn't handle any of it.

Then things got a bit better. We got the diet under control, we got the medication under control, and teething started. And he got sick with colds. Or a diet error occurs. It seems to never end. The nights of crying, of not wanting to be put down. Of misery!

And yet, my baby doesn't see the world as a cruel place most of the time! He is happy, he is social, he wants to PLAY. He wants to be with you, he wants to learn, he wants to explore, he wants to see. He wants to talk and laugh and run - even though he isn't quite able to do all of those things yet. And although I am sometimes happy he will never remember these early months, because he's been uncomfortable for so much of it, his joy at most waking moments lights your heart. If only he could remember the excitement of all the discoveries he's making. Imagine remembering sheer joy at the taste of a fisher price metal cymbal, or at waving to grammie, and grandpa, and mommy, and daddy, and the kitty, and the mirror, and the lights, and the wall, and the flowers, and the cars, and the wall, and his feet!!!

I worry a lot that through my baby's eyes, life is a misery because he's had so many 'hiccups', but I don't think I really need to worry when I see how happy he is most of the time. I guess the trade off is me accepting that he isn't a good sleeper ;)

I had a hard time figuring out how to write a post with this topic and enlisted my husband for help. I'm including his suggestion because I'm not sure it isn't the better post :)

"In my eyes, by Kiernan

In my eyes I like to put fingers, and food and RUB IT IN, and sometimes my daddy pours water over my hair in the bath and he's protecting my eyes but I PUSH HIM AWAY and he gets water in my eyes and I HATE IT! But ooh, look, a ducky to hug... HEY WHY IS HE POKING MY EYES?!""

Lara is a 30 year old first-time mom from Ottawa, Ontario. Her blog is called Mommyhood for Lara, but a name change is imminent :) This post is part of the blog exchange and you can find Nancy's post for today here.

Happy Birthday!!

Today is my younger son's birthday. He turned the big 3!!

My husband and I have been talking about this day for some time because we have been trying to convince my son that three-year-old boys sleep in their own beds. Yes, for the last three years it has been quite the rare night when I haven't had my younger son in bed with me and over the last year or so that has meant that my husband has been sleeping elsewhere. There just isn't room for the three of us.

Anyway, he's been saying all along (except for the occasional "No. Maybe when I'm four.") that he will sleep in his own bed after his birthday. Well, today we wished him happy birthday and reminded him that he was going to have to sleep in his own bed tonight. "Today's not my birthday." We explained to him that today was indeed his birthday, but he wasn't going for it.

He's convinced that tomorrow is his birthday because that's when he's having his birthday party. So it looks like my husband will be spending one more night on the couch ;)

Besides the birthday excitement, it's been pretty low key around here. We just spent the last few days in the great state of Maine where the water was extremely cold, but that didn't seem to stop my older son from hitting the waves. Literally.

His teeth were chattering; His lips were blue when he came out, but he had a GREAT time and wanted to know when the next time would be that we would go to the beach. I enjoyed reading (a little) in the sun and watching my little one get covered in sand. It was literally everywhere and was quite the project getting it all out. (Thank you, Daddy!)

So now it's onto the birthday weekend. Hopefully a night or two alone in bed with my husband. And back to work on Sunday . . . If only every week were a vacation week . . . Although I'd need to get paid to be on vacation to afford it :)

Discrimination Knows No Time Limit

I'm over at The Soccer Mom Vote today writing about the pay discrimination suit that went all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court a couple of weeks ago. Let me know what you think :)

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And on a completely different note, I'd like to share a little conversation my four-year-old and I had yesterday . . .

Me: Can you please help me clean up these toys?

Four-Year-Old: I don't want to help you clean up.

Me: Well, it wasn't really a question. You need to help me clean up these toys.

FYO: I said I don't want to!

Me: Don't speak to me like that! You can either help me clean up or you can have a time out in your room.

FYO: (with an evil glint in his eye) You know, sometimes I like it when you go to work, Mommy.

Me: Well, sometimes I like being at work . . . Now help me clean up.

Father's Are Important, Too

Happy Father's Day to the best dad two boys could have . . . Thank you for teaching by example, for giving us the best you have even when you're tired and overworked and for showing our boys how to respect and treat a woman by the way you love and care for me :)
I love you.

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Dad, I'm glad to hear that George is still kicking. I was reminiscing today about all kinds of things . . . Indian Princesses . . . UNO games (Poor Uncle Jay) . . . Saturday morning cartoons . . . Nightmare Gallery (was that what it was called?) . . . Learning to drive . . . Your rescue mission to Paris . . . Thank you for everything. I miss you. I love you.

I'm still a daddy's girl at heart ;)

I'm Still Here

Yes, I know. I haven't been blogging. Haven't been in the mood, I guess. Been busy with other things - Work mainly, but I've managed to squeeze in some good stuff, too. You know, real life. Like Thursday . . .

Thursday was my older son's last day of school. It was exciting (even at four years old he knows enough to look forward to summer vacation) and a little sad, too. I tend to get attached. I'm going to miss his teacher. (I will admit to having one of those sad smiles on my face when he hugged his preschool teacher goodbye.) She was great with him. She really got to know him and our whole family. She even gave him what I consider to be one of the best compliments someone can give when she told me that he reminded her of her own son :)

I won't miss having to split my day in half to go pick him up for lunch. I'll enjoy being able to take a few highly anticipated day trips to the zoo and such. It will be nice for my younger son to have his playmate back in the A.M. And it will be fun to experience that back-to-school excitement again in the fall. (Kind of brings me back to when I was a kid . . . going school shopping, picking out my first day of school outfit, not being able to sleep the night before the big first day . . .)

So that was Thursday. I've also been reading a lot instead of writing. Really I should be doing both, but haven't quite found that balance yet. I'm reading "American Bloomsbury: Louisa May Alcott, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Margaret Fuller, Nathaniel Hawthorne, and Henry David Thoreau: Their Lives, Their Loves, Their Work" by Susan Cheever. (Yes I'm on that transcendentalism kick again :) It's pretty good. A good portion of it I'd read in other books, but I'm learning a lot about Alcott and Hawthorne that I didn't know before. It really was a kind of magical time in the mid-1800's in Concord, MA. I think I would have enjoyed the atmosphere - all that talk of literature and philosophy. The idea that there was more to life than just work . . . That God could be found in nature and not just in a church . . . That it was important to experience life, to live it, to not rush from one task to another in order to get everything done . . . I just think I would have liked it.

What else? Oh, I was listening to one of my favorite shows on NPR the other day, On Point with Tom Ashbrook, and they were doing one of my favorite topics of the year - summer reading lists. Ashbrook had several guests on sharing what they thought would be great summer reads this year. There were quite a few that sounded interesting and I've already suggested Boomsday by Christopher Buckley to my husband. (Buckley wrote Thank You for Smoking which I haven't read but the movie was darkly hilarious.) It seems right up his alley. If you're looking for something to pick up at the bookstore, be sure and check out their list.

Another topic that was covered this week on the show was titled "The End of the Private Life." It talked about how people are willing to share everything from their most embarrassing moment to stories about their children and bosses with complete strangers via the Internet. And it got me thinking. I've always tried to be somewhat conscious of revealing too much (because you never know who might be reading :) but I know that I have also written things on here that I don't have the courage to say out loud anywhere else.

At the same time, I started to think about how this blog has changed over the last year or so. It started out as something that was somewhat impersonal where I mainly talked about issues that were important to me or thoughts I had about random things I saw or read about, but now it seems I spend more time talking about my personal life than anything else. And I'm not sure that's how I want it to be. I need to reevaluate what it is I want my writing to represent. I think I need to refocus on some of the issues that are important to me and share my ideas with all of you so that maybe you'll begin to do some thinking of your own.

Maybe I just haven't been thinking that much lately about anything other than my personal stuff . . . That's certainly a possibility and if that's the case, I definitely need to switch gears.

All right. My mind has pretty much shut down at this point. Getting up at 5 a.m. makes for a long day by four in the afternoon. I could really use a nap. Or maybe I should go clean my house. It could use it. But I'll probably go try and catch up on my magazine reading instead. Give me something to write about ;)


***Just to illustrate how unmotivated I've been - I started this entry Friday morning at 7:30 a.m. and didn't get around to finishing/posting it until 4 p.m. on Saturday. Oh well.

Not Sad :)

The wedding was beautiful . . . The bride was stunning, of course (I can't believe my baby sister is all growed up!) . . .


And my boys (and nephew on the left) were dapper in their tuxedos . .

I actually didn't cry on the big day. I was just too happy. Not only for my sister who is starting a whole new part of her life, but I'm happy to be (finally) getting the brother I always wanted!!!

The weather was clear, warm and full of sunshine. I took SO MANY photos (probably trying to make up for what I lost the night before), but haven't had time to download them off the camera yet.

It's been great having some of my family up visiting as well. My sister, nephew and niece have been at my house daily (much to my sons' enjoyment, and mine, too!) and my dad was able to make it to my house and see where we're living now. It's basically been a week full of activity and fun and it was so hard to go back to work on Monday.

But things are slowly settling back to "normal" and our routine is slowly making its comeback. It's kind of like Christmas - you look forward to the big day all year and then it's over in a flash.

Congratulations Kelly and Nick!!!

Random Facts

I don't want you to think I haven't been learning just because I haven't been posting. Here are just a few random facts I've picked up over the last few days:

Four days ago I learned: that Mother's Day was originally celebrated as Mother's Peace Day. Julia Ward Howe issued the Mother's Day Proclamation in 1870 in response to the impact of the Civil War. (It's a beautiful piece - brief - and I encourage you to read it) Lisse over at the Soccer Mom Vote points out - "Mother's Day was made official by Woodrow Wilson in 1912, but the "Peace" was left out of it. Two years later, World War I began." Chocolates and flowers are great, but as too often happens to women - even in 2007 - our aspirations and ideas are minimized. Mother's Day has gone the way of Christmas with its commercialization when what we could really use right now as wars continue to rage around the world are Howe's words and her inspiration to act.

Three days ago I learned: that bamboo is like, uber-wood, except that it's actually a grass than can be used in more than 5,000 ways! Used in everything from surfboards to furniture, fuel, textiles, food, medicine - even to build homes! - bamboo can be grown on every continent except at the Poles and at alarming rates. Giant bamboo can grow more than three feet in a DAY which means that 60 feet of bamboo can be replaced in 59 days while the same size oak tree would take more than 50 years! Bamboo is also great for the environment - releasing 35% more oxygen and absorbing four times as much carbon-dioxide than an entire forest of trees. (For more fun bamboo facts check out The Ecologist Online.

Two days ago I learned: that my older son is the sweetest four-year-old on the planet (although I previously had my suspicions.) He explained to me, on Mother's Day no less, that "No matter what I do; No matter where I go, I will still love you." Tissues anyone?

Yesterday I learned: dairy cows produce EIGHT gallons of milk per day! (Thank you, Buster Baxter for that fast fact.) It may not seem like all that much when you consider that the average American consumes about 6000 ounces of dairy products annually, but as a mother who breastfed both of her children - That's a lot of milk!!

Today I learned: Pink has a song I actually like. (Thanks, Cheryl!) Dear Mr. President is emotionally raw (although the live version was better) and political and real . . . and it puts my FAVORITE president in a not-so-flattering light :)

Mother's Day

I had planned an elaborate, well-thought out Mother's Day post that would honor mothers everywhere. I had planned to do some research about the beginnings of Mother's Day and talk about what it has evolved into. I had planned . . .

Instead, as my tribute to mothers everywhere, I did something that most mothers do daily - I ran out of the time and energy to put together what I had previously planned to do.

So I will be enjoying a simple, quiet Mother's Day working in my backyard with my husband and my two sons. I will enjoy a quiet dinner and evening and will maybe even get some reading in before I sit in front of the television tonight for my weekly indulgence of "Desperate Housewives" and "Brothers and Sisters." And then I will quietly drift off to sleep (probably with a child in my bed next to me.)

Here's wishing the rest of you moms out there a pleasant, safe, relatively quiet, without sibling squabbles and whining, Mother's Day during which I hope you can find some time to yourself where you can just be you - while receiving chocolate and flowers, too :)